Fearing God...And Wrestling

So, I am in a battle with myself once again. This comes up many times when you are in relationship with God.. I am having a hard time making the desicion on if I should or should not go to Sonshine. And my answer is no. I feel called in both Sonshine and that I can be used there bu I also feel like I need to rest in the Lord at home this summer in preparation for next year. I will still be continuing to serve at home, but not with campers on a boat away from my family. God's ministry is so much bigger than what I can imagine and I know if I continue top pursue him with a pure heart and not walking in sin, but walking into His truth, he will never lead me astray. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and staff they comfort me. When God's truth is laid out, I know I cannot go wrong. I think that not being in Sonshine, I am going to have to work harder at staying focused with God simply because I am not going to be surrounded by a leadership of christians for 3 straight weeeks non stop, but that doesnt mean that God won't work and still make me grow. I feel like this summer, with the people I am going to be surrounding myself with, like Malina, Julie and the rest of sharehouse people, and my other close friends, I can both be used to encourage them and also learn from them. Also, I want to serve at Rock Harbor ministries when i am home. So, making this decision, I will continue to pray into what God has for me this summer, and God has given me peace. Peace that surpasses all understanding, and I do not need to be afraid, because I have God on my side and he loves me unconditionally no matter what desision I make. His love never fails. That is why I believe what I believe. I am still a follower of Jesus Christ and try to be a reflection of Him and a light to this world.